When we think of Valentines Day, we generally think of roses, chocolates, getting engaged and, well… generally its about her. As a woman, I think the man gets a rather poor deal out of this.
In these days of better equality and gender identity, why is this holiday still considered as essentially for females? That’s not to say a gay couple wouldn’t celebrate Valentines day, but more that our imagery of valentines day is focused so prevalently on women.
Valentines Day Traditions
I am a bit of a traditionalist at heart. And then again, I am not. I like when a gentleman acts like a gentleman. In other words treats me well and with courtesy. And sure I do love being put on the odd pedestal. But I also like to fly in the eye of tradition and surprise a man now and then, and especially on Valentines Day.
As it takes two to tango, to my mind it should not just be me that receives something special on this special day. I do love giving flowers, whether female or male. But some men, often depending on their culture, find receiving flowers embarrassing. Chocolate is always a good one. Who doesn’t like to receive in particular a beautiful box of chocolates? Dinner and a nice wine is something we would both enjoy.
Thinking of Him
I personally, at least, make specially crafted cards. As someone who enjoys creating cards, it would be rude not to include fellows in the giving. It’s a win win for me. A chance to create one of my favourite things. And then, if it’s a far off male friend, a chance to write a nice long letter. Although I do love the art of letter writing, sometimes I like a prompt to make me write. Like Christmas cards, Valentines day is an excuse to write to people in my mind, especially the men in my life.
I also like to look for something a little unique for him, something he won’t be expecting, something that will simply make him smile. I have no idea what that something will be, but I am always on the look out. It could be just a bit of fun, or possibly something quite special.
If I like what I see…
My main port of call will be Etsy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I sell on Etsy, but I also shop there. In fact for anything special, I do almost all my shopping there. Why? Because I like the ethos. I like buying from small businesses. But most importantly, I know I will find something unique every time. After all, if I am finding and selling unique items, it stands to reason so are others. So if I don’t find something whilst I am buying for My Shop, well then, I will surf other Etsy shops.
My other go to if I want to look at a physical item, and honestly this is the preference, is charity shops and antique shops. The latter are always fun because they are generally curated to showcase those stand out items. And the thing about antiques, they often made really quirky and beautifully crafted items in the past. Contrary to today when so much of what is made is poor quality (unless made by a small business artisan who actually cares.)
As for charity shops, it does depend on the country and charity shop itself. After all people drop off all sorts of junk, and that means having to wade through quite a lot to find the odd gem. But then that is part of the fun, the looking. It’s rather like a treasure hunt. And I am lucky living in France, I recognise this, as there is so much history and artisanship that finding wonderful things is sort of a given. I have certainly found some real treasures over the years of looking, but it does take time and patience which may not be useful if you need a gift ‘now’.
Crafting it
The Thinking Closet offers some great ideas of what you can make for him, especially last minute. They searched out 30 different projects. A few of these ideas some men might roll their eyes at (though I would love), but it gave me some considerations. I just love the DIY cufflinks as a gentleman can never have enough cufflinks.
DIYs offer another selection, this time 45 ideas. These are grouped into sections for husbands, boyfriend, make it yourself or buy. My favourite is the jar of nuts. I think it’s an easy and fun idea. One that tickles me is the personalised maps of significant locations in your relationship. That’s a cute idea.
Crafty, I’m Not
If you prefer to buy for him, then I am going to blatantly suggest shopping from one of my shops, whether for valentines or just to give him something special on another special day.
Just click on the picture if you like something to see more.
Have a Happy Valentines Day
Whatever way you prefer to celebrate Valentines Day, with a partner, family, children or even alone, I wish you the best for your day.
If you enjoy my musings, you can read more in my Niche & Novelties posts.
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